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Greetings everyone, it is I- the Great One- Ace Gumley back once again to enthrall and entertain. I would have been back much sooner, but apparently C.R.A.B.S. is going the way of the NHL- that is bankruptcy. They just couldn't afford widdle ol me. Until now, when they need me most anyway. Well, let's see what we have here, the first week has gone by, Crabapple, Chicago and Vegas top the AL, Sacramento and Scottsdale in the NL- I can live with that- well, seems my job's done here! Alright, alright, don't get your panties bunched up now, I'll check in with the teams, starting with the.. SACRAMENTO GIANTS- Oh my stars and garters, Sacramento's in first place. Well, I'll be it seems like at least six months since the last time they attained that lofty position! Unless you're countin' that sham off-season C.R.A.B.S. basketball league (Partly to blame for the sudden money crisis). Same old story here- a pound of Pedro (And he doesn't have too many to spare), a pinch of Smoltz and a dash of Helton. No reason to expect less than a ninth postseason berth for the Giants. Wake me for the playoffs, please. KEEP AN EYE ON: Danny Bautista. SCOTTSDALE HAWKEYES- Tejada, Thome and Vidro picked up the offense in week one, while C.C. Sabathia, Jeff Weaver and Ted Lilly turned in primo starts in all three victories. This team should challenge for the playoffs- no lock here- but they're going to need some help from a questionable outfield. KEEP AN EYE ON: Hank Blalock and Mark Teixeira. LOS ANGELES LOBSTERS- An improved middle infield offensively may take some of the glare off the pitching staff being lit up, but it won't hide it. The Crusties should hit with the best of them, but then Livan will come in to pitch...Seriously though, having Rodrigo Lopez and Paul Byrd for a full year will help, Brett Tomko should help and John Thomson may prove useful, but I always come back to Livan. And I'm trying to eat here, thank you very much! If they can add some pitching, I'd like their chances. KEEP AN EYE ON: Duh...the starting pitching. OAKLAND ATHLETICS- A horrid start after losing three of four to Chicago. It should just be a bump in the road (Not another 1995) to another playoff race. This is purty much the same team as last year with a few youngsters sprinkled about in reserve roles. The good news is that Kevin Brown appears to be healthy for the first time since J-Lo married lucky bachelor #1. They'll be there in the end. KEEP AN EYE ON: Frank Thomas and Javier Lopez. HOLLYWOOD STARLETS- If only the rest of this team played like their outfielders...This team was one of my favorites last year until the pitching staff sucked doo and dragged the whole season into kerplunk-ville. I'm not bitter, though. Like Oakland, Hollywood returns basically the same team with two notable exceptions: Rookie starter Ricardo Rodriguez and thirdbaseman Joe Crede. Rodriguez threw a humdinger of a debut, but the big news is that the Joe Crede Era in Hollywood has officially been begat. Begotten. They begat the era that was begotten. Anyway, unlike LA, these pitchers have the talent to succeed, the question is will they? KEEP AN EYE ON: Same as LA, bub- gotta be the starting pitching. CRABAPPLE MANIACS- Even though they played some close games against New England, the Maniac's managed to hang at the top of the charts after week one, even without the suspended bad boy Mike Piazza (I told him if he kept making those silly long distance commercials that sooner or later the proverbial poop would hit the fan). Last season, the outfield was in shambles, but until earlier today, The Kid appeared healthy. Guess I can take that back now. Griff's seperated shoulder's gonna cost him a good chunk of the season (Maybe he doesn't like Maine air?), but this year the Maniac's have some depth in the outfield. Ben Grieve is the most likely replacement. Damn, that's scary. At least Brian Jordan hit 3 homeruns last week- maybe he can cover for Griffey and Grieve. The pitching staff is talented, but thin and the bullpen unproven, but if Vaughn, Grieve and Jordan can pull their weight this year, they'll challenge. KEEP AN EYE ON: Griffey and the bullpen (Sounds kinda like a BJ and the Bear ripoff- Greg Evigan anyone?). CHICAGO WHITE SOX- Holy Bejeebies, Batman! The Sox couldn't have come out of the box hoping for more, taking three out of 4 from Oakland to start 2003 with a BANG! Hideo Nomo got the call on Opening Day and proceeded to fire zeroes at the A's in the form of a 4-hit shutout. BOOM! The best news though, was the production from Moises Alou, whose 6 RBI and 37 points virtually eclipsed his entire 2002 season, and might be enough reason to get his face off of all those milk cartons. This team received an infusion of new talent: Winn, Santiago, Matthews, etc., and they'll be a handful for Crabapple in the battle for the AL wildcard. KEEP AN EYE ON: Rookie Ramon Santiago. LAS VEGAS DEVIL RAYS- Apparently they took a drink from the same coma inducing fountain as Oakland, as the Hoosiers shocked Vegas in the season's first two games, before bouncing back with three straight wins. Despite that opening slip, this is still THE team to beat in AL. Not convinced? Look pardner, this is the defending AL Champ, and they'll have Bret Boone and Edgar Martinez in their lineup for the entire season for the first time. And then there was that Ivan Rodriguez trade. If I recall right it was Rodriguez and the AL crown for the Cabin Boy and Snuffeluffugus. Start printing the playoff tickets. KEEP AN EYE ON: Kazuhiro Sasaki's health. INDIANA HOOSIERS- Despite losing the last three to Vegas, the Hoosiers still stand as the league's highest scoring team. Could Durazo, Snow, Zeile & Co. be the real deal? Don't bet the house, bub. Even after Brad Ausmus' career-high two homer game on Friday, this team is really going to miss Ivan. Ain't no doubt about that one, my friend. With some luck, they could hang around long enough to be a nuisance. KEEP AN EYE ON: Joe Borchard's eventual 2003 arrival. NEW ENGLAND SNOW BALLS- Missed it bythatmuch! A hit here or a Jose Jimenez non-explosion there and this team could easily have taken Crabapple 4-1. As it was, the team has to be happy with the early production of new outfielder Raul Ibanez and the first start of the year from Mark Redman. If they could keep Jimmy Haynes from spontaneously combusting on the mound, they might be on to something. The goal for New England this year is simple- leapfrog Indiana for fourth. I correctly predicted the opposite last year, and I'm here to tell you- the Ball's just might do it. KEEP AN EYE ON: Jeff Cirillo. Well, that's just about all the prognosticatin' the C.R.A.B.S. folks can afford this week, if they can break into their piggy banks and pool their money together, I just might be back next week. In case you're looking for my World Series pick- let's go with Vegas over Oakland in six. Until next time, Aces everyone! |